I catch myself wondering how much different last Thursday's spring storm would have been if we had The Storm Force. You ask, "What's The Storm Force?" Good question. If you're a media purveyor like myself, you know that Fox 31 and KWGN Channel 2 have combined operations. What does it mean? It means stuff like Channel 2 News is on at 7 p.m. now for people who can't wait till 9 to hear our economy sucks and it means they have really hip commercials that encourage you "It's time to lose wait." If it was a commercial for speedy oil changes and not diet supplements, it would be perfect. It also means they are calling themselves "The Deuce" but only because The Doz would have – wait for it– alienated non-illegal immigrant viewers. But, more than anything, it means The Storm Force.
The Storm Force is a group of mutated meteorologists created by the maniacal Dr. Xavier to help stop El Nino but, now that their work is done, they are teaming up to fight weather in Colorado. Angie "Don't Call Me Steve" Austin has laser vision able to deflect an incoming storm front. Dave "Down Goes" Frazer can move faster than a F4 Tornado and hangs out in mobile home parks way more often too. Jason "My last name doesn't avail itself to a nickname" Boyer can morph into a giant wall that saves helpless skiers from a coming avalanche. Together, they are The Storm Force – our last home against their archenemy – the evil Mother Nature. They will save you and let you know to grab a jacket Thursday – highs in the mid 50s and lows in the 30s.
