Very cool

We're sporting a brand new look. Special thanks to my talented wife for giving my blog a sleek, new style. She also designed the new header.

She didn't do windows

Try explaining this to your wife:

TAMPA (AP) - A nude maid is accused of really cleaning up at a Florida man's home.

The Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office said a 50-year-old man hired the maid from the Internet on Friday to clean his Tampa home.

Authorities said the woman arrived at the home in a one-piece, light colored dress. She took off the dress and cleaned the house for $100-per-hour. Sheriff's office spokeswoman Debbie Carter said the man told deputies he left the maid alone in the bedroom to clean.

When the man's wife came home from vacation, she discovered $40,000 in jewelry missing from their bedroom.

Tragic reminder of nature's fury

I tracked the path of Thursday’s series of deadly tornadoes on a police radio frequency from the safety of my office desk.
Sometimes, it’s hard to judge the gravity of a situation from the intermittent radio communications between emergency responders and dispatchers.
But when I heard a police officer or firefighter in Windsor come over the radio and say, “We are in total destruction,” I knew it was simply more than some simple wind and hail damage.
What a terrible feeling to see one of our own communities leveled in a way that I think we normally associate with middle-of-the-night twisters ripping through Oklahoma and Kansas. I’m sure many of you thought of last year’s Holly tornado. I immediately thought of the large tornado that destroyed the eastern Colorado town of Limon in 1990. But, even for a Colorado native, the thought of severe weather before lunchtime is odd.
Maybe it’s because we’re so blessed in Colorado with our weather. Sure we get heavy snowstorms from time to time and severe weather especially around this time of year is always a possibility. But, all in all, we’ve got it pretty good here.
More unnerving than the obvious destruction and loss of life is that sense of vulnerability that it brings. I had that feeling a couple other times this past month as a cyclone took a large amount of life in the country of Myanmar and a massive earthquake did likewise in China.
I can’t honestly equate our tornadoes to those massive human tragedies. Still, it gets you wondering. I’m sure scientists could point to climate change and global warming as a reason just as Bible scholars could point to end times.
I don’t believe in God smiting us with a heavy finger of fury. Do I think sometimes a higher power shakes our little snow globe to remind us who’s in charge? Yeah, I think that.
I’ve never seen the human spirit so strong than in disasters like this. I have no doubt the town of Windsor will get back on its feet just as Limon did and Holly and Greensburg, Kan., continue to do. There’s no better feeling than seeing a community rise up together from the rubble.
And on the public safety note, let’s look to the skies, people. This can happen anywhere and we need to keep each other safe.

Why, yes, I am a jerk. Thanks for noticing

Since I wrote a column last week about the Duggar family, I've been besieged by e-mails. Yes, when we get more than four e-mails on any topic, we close the castle door and declare a besieging. I've been accused of not knowing women (nice to hear it coming from someone besides my wife) to wrongfully accusing the Duggar family of frequenting shopping malls to getting up early in the morning to write my columns. I will not rescind my opinions. If I'm going to cut and run every time I take a stance and it angers somebody, then I might as well quit and run for political office. I will say that the point of last week's column was not so much to slam the Duggars as it was to point out the pain of infertility versus their decided non-fertility. Did my acerbic wit instead lead me down a path that took too many easy and unnecessary potshots at a family that has done nothing to me? Perhaps. People also took an offense at my comment about the family forming a milita. C'mon, people, that was a joke. Have you ever tried to get a teenager or toddler to do anything, let alone participate in a successful government overthrow. If the Duggar family or any of the 15,000 million Duggar devotees who apparently read my column as well were angered or hurt, I apologize. I am intrigued by a frequent comment I got over the past weekend, saying their choice to have a large family was what this country was built on and that's the way it was 100 years ago. With all deference to history, we also used to deny minorities and women the right to vote and drive around in clunky, old jalopy's. Just because we did it in the past, doesn't means it works as well today.

Into the weekend

Hey, it's been a quiet week in blog land and, heading into Memorial Day weekend,
we'll just keep it that way. Think of all the people in Windsor this weekend while you enjoy your barbecues. See you next week.

Martinez gets 8 years

I know this story left people in Brighton with a lot of different feelings. Wanted to make sure you had an outlet to express those especially as it comes to an end.

BRIGHTON — Allen Beck only wanted to see justice for his daughter.

In the end, the often-ponderous wheels of justice turned far too slowly.

Beck, 50, died Saturday at his Brighton home just three days before a rescheduled sentencing hearing for Steven Martinez, the man convicted in March of vehicular homicide and careless driving stemming from a 2005 accident that claimed the life of 16-year-old Chelsea Beck, a Brighton High School junior.

Adams County Court Judge Thomas E. Ensor sentenced Martinez, 21, to eight years in prison Tuesday morning with a mandatory five years parole. The sentence ended three years punctuated by a lengthy mental health institutionalization for Martinez, continuances, postponed hearings and lawyer changes.

“A long-ass journey,” mother Shelly Beck said outside the courtroom. “I’m so glad it’s over. I needed some closure.”

She said she would have liked to see Martinez get a maximum 12 years in prison, but she was happy he finally stood before the court and took accountability for his actions. Beck admitted she was struggling with a variety of emotions on the heels of Allen’s sudden death. Allen had been at the May 8 sentencing date, which was delayed because of a missing community corrections report.

Shelly told Ensor that the pain of Chelsea’s death clouded their positive thoughts of a “selfless, kind, lady.”

She said Martinez neglected her daughter that Jan. 31 evening when his silver Cadillac slammed into the back of a tow truck in the Brighton roundabouts as he drove away from a pursuing police officer.

“Steven had total disregard for Chelsea and cared for no one but himself,” she said.

Martinez, who rarely spoke during court hearings and didn’t take the stand during his trial, said he took responsibility for his action and was in search of forgiveness.

“I never meant for this to happen,” he said. “All I’m asking for is forgiveness.”

Martinez said he wished he could go back and changed what happened.

“I pray every day it was my life taken, not hers,” he said.

“God knows I’m trying. God knows I’m sorry,” Martinez added about how the accident has changed his life. “I just want something positive to come from this.”

Martinez’ public defender, Scott Evans, said his client does not recall the accident because of serious head injuries and has struggled to come to terms with what happened.

“He couldn’t believe he could have done something like this,” Evans said.

Evans said he was disappointed Martinez was declined as a candidate for community corrections and questioned whether a prison sentence was the best choice for his client.

Ensor said in 30 years as a judge, these cases always prove to be the hardest.

“Sometimes I really like my job,” he said. “Sometimes, I really hate my job. This is one of those times.”

He said he didn’t doubt Martinez’ sincerity but granting probation just wasn’t appropriate. Ensor said a sentence isn’t just meant to punish the convicted party but hopefully send a message to anyone who, in this particular case, might think about getting behind the wheel of a car after drinking.

Martinez was credited for time already served – 717 days. Most of that time was spent at the Colorado State Mental Institution in Pueblo where Martinez was sent after a different judge originally ruled him mentally incompetent to stand trial. That decision was overturned in early 2007.

The sentence triggered a flood of raw emotion in the courtroom. Martinez called out to her handcuffed son, “I love you, baby,” as he was led away by deputies. Meanwhile, a sobbing Shelly embraced Adams County District Attorney deputy prosecutors, Jaime Cowan and Rhoda Pilmer. The two also shed tears – symbolic of the time and emotion invested in the case. Other family members clutched framed pictures of Chelsea and an easel also held a poster board collage of family photos.

Funeral services for Allen Beck will be at 11 a.m., Thursday morning.

Eighteen is more than enough

Shouts of glee could be heard from the producers of daytime gabfests across this country when Little Rock’s very own Duggar family and its matriarch, Michelle Duggar, announced earlier this month she was knocked up again.
Knocked up hardly seems the right term when you’re on your 18th kid – perhaps knocked over or even knocked senseless would be more apropos.
Maybe you haven’t been introduced to the Duggars – a group multiplying faster than gremlins at Water World. Imagine being trampled by them trying to get a pretzel at an Arkansas mall.
Nevertheless, the news, especially coinciding with Mother’s Day, was welcome fodder for talk shows needing to fill that vacant bottom of the third hour slot. It also was good news for the cable station, TLC, which now almost solely caters to women expecting litters. One might think a couple with this kind of propensity for adult relations be relegated to one of those triple-digit adult channels by this point – the kind that curious teens watch through the squiggly lines while their parents are in the other room.
On the surface, the story is sickeningly sweet. Boy meets girl. Boy loves girl. Boy really loves girl. Boy, stop loving girl or we will be forced to get the fire hose.
I don’t want to be the proverbial child who walks into his parents’ bedroom in the middle of the night in need of a glass of water and puts a damper on things. But how many kids are too many kids?
Give them credit. The Duggars plan is ingenious. The older kids (the oldest is 20) are actually implemented as a slave labor force to care for the younger children. This presumably frees up the parents to focus on – well, do I have to draw pictures here, folks?
At this point, I can only surmise three theories for why the Duggars are pro procreators: a) they’ve missed that seventh grade science lesson and they don’t know what’s causing this, b) they’re attempting to win a spot in some record book or c) they’re forming a small militia that will eventually overthrow our government. They’ve already passed the line of demarcation where they’d be an effective family band (everybody wants to be Keith) and they’re too small to form an NFL football franchise (though I like the depth of their bullpen for the Rockies).
I have no problem with large families, provided you don’t need me to babysit. I do, however, have a problem on behalf of some 2.1 million couples that are infertile and the 9.3 million women who have resorted to fertility services in an effort to add a missing piece to their families. Yes, while one family is doing its best impression of a gestational Tic Tac box, other couples struggle, often fruitlessly, to ever have children. I, thankfully, can’t understand that kind of anguish or how hard it is to hear stories like these.
In light of those harsh realities, the Duggars ability to have child after child after child could come off as braggadocios, if not just plain cruel.
Is that the Duggars fault or even their problem? No. They are well within their rights. The last thing I would ever want to do is suggest a one-child limit similar to China or suggest we don’t have children out of respect for couples who can’t. Nor, do the Duggars owe some apology to infertile couples any more than a family who is simply blessed with one child.
Still, would it be unreasonable to ask that they loan out their children on a regular basis to couples who cannot have children? We’d call it the Duggar family library. Oh, c’mon, they’ve got 18 kids. They’re going to miss one for a couple years?
Again, far be it from me to judge the Duggars. They can do what they want and they have, over and over and over again. But when they hit kid number 45 (she’s only 41) and you’re watching hour 12 of “The Today Show,” wondering how they do it (in the figurative sense, of course), just remember it doesn’t always come that easy.
And that’s a shame.

Forewarned

Be careful if you find yourself on Telluride Street on the east side of I-76, near 144th Avenue. The prairie dogs are playing chicken with the cars. Apparently, they don't get too many vehicles out that way. Crazy Bastards!

Justice has gone to the dogs

I came back to my desk last week after a court hearing for a young man sentenced in a vehicular homicide case that claimed the life of a young, promising life.
A co-worker instinctively asked, “Well, what’d he get?”
“Seven years,” I replied. “That’s the going rate for a human life this week.”
The comment was flippant at best and my apologies to anyone who takes offense.
Meanwhile, a man in eastern Colorado was sitting in jail, awaiting charges on animal cruelty after more than 40 dogs were allegedly found starved to death inside a kennel he owned.
Animal abuse sickens me. I don’t know how anyone can mistreat, torture or starve a poor, defenseless creature.
But when the presumptive range of time this man could possibly face if convicted was announced, I had to scratch my head. One to two years on each of the 46 counts of animal cruelty, four years on each count if aggravating factors are found.
So, absent a plea deal, this man could spend anywhere from 46 to 184 years in prison.
We throw the book at animal offenders these days. I’m guessing the name Michael Vick might ring a bell. Heck, animal rights groups were even ready to string up a jockey last week after his horse broke down and was later euthanized at the Kentucky Derby.
It all leaves me confused. It’s not just animal abusers either. I heard some 72-year-old man got 300 years in prison last month for fraud. That’ll show him. Let’s tack on 500 years of parole, just in case somebody gets any funny ideas about being immortal.
Bottom line, get drunk, kill someone and we can only put you away for so long. Bite a dog or gyp some old people and we’re throwing away the key?
What am I missing?
While I can’t vouch for the reasoning behind severe punishment for thieves – other than we really don’t like people taking our money – I get the animal cruelty idea. Ostensibly, if someone can hurt an animal, they can hurt anybody.
I sort of buy that.
Think of it as a gateway crime. Man kicks cat, next time man kicks me.
This isn’t an attempt to condone animal cruelty. Instead, I’m looking for some congruity in our justice system.
Are we now saying the value of a dog’s life is equivalent, if not more than that of a human?
I have a hard time getting my mind around that.
I think it’s more likely our society’s need to provide a defense for the defenseless, a voice for the voiceless.
Good, that’s very admirable.
But if you believe a 10-year-old riding home in a SUV after skating isn’t defenseless, then we need to talk.

Brighton train blues

Couldn't help but rethink the opening stanza of an old Johnny Cash tune while I waited for a particularly slow Brighton train last week:

I heard the train a'comin
I knew I was at a dead end,
And I ain't seen the other side of Bridge Street
Since, I don't when
I'm stuck at Bridge and Main Street
And time keeps draggin on
But that train keeps sittin
While I talk on my phone

Signed, sealed and hungry

Just days after the U.S. Post Office encouraged us to stamp out hunger by handing over the canned food, they have raised the price of stamps to 42 cents. Wait a minute, Mr. Postman, I need that can of corn back. It's sending a letter over groceries this week.

Life as a sex symbol degrading, demoralizing

I hadn't stepped out of our office building yesterday and taken more than one stride to my car when the hoots and wolf whistles started from a group of patrons at the bar across the street. Honestly, people, I'm not a piece of meat. I'm a professional reporter. I know the sight of a man in dress slacks with a notebook and an empty tupperware container is hard to resist. But let's be adults. The only solace I found is at least they didn't bother the attractive-looking woman that had just walked past me.

BTW (that's 13-year-old girlenese for "by the way," I appreciate your responses to my rather general poll question while I'm sad things apparently aren't going that well. I will resist the urge to make next week's question, "What's wrong?"

Oh scientists, you tease, you torment, you tantalize

Scientists amaze me.
They get excited about the most trivial things. Just like me. That’s why I like them.
So you can imagine how pumped scientists were recently when they found out some newer galaxies in the solar system are actually just as heavy as older galaxies.
Confused?
Me too. Totally lost. That’s why you have a writer from sciencenews.org to explain it. He likened it to picking up a tiny baby and finding that he’s as heavy as a full-grown adult.
This is also how my wife would explain arguing with me.
Still totally not blown away?
How about we let one of the experts break it down for you? This scientist has three names and his first name is spelled weird too, so that’s instant credibility. Take it away, Sir Pieter van Dokkum of a certain Yale University.
“We expected that these galaxies would be more or less the same size as those in today’s universe,” he says. “But instead of being precocious in both size and weight, it turns out that some are tiny.”
I know I should just stop right there. But I can’t.
We must continue.
Van Dokkun says this creates a mystery. He explains that most young galaxies are both small and lightweight. Van Dokkum thought, according to the article, that the few youngsters his team had found that were heavy – bodies that despite their youth had quickly matured, produced a huge number of stars and then stopped – would also be large.
I think this has something to do with why the “American Idol” ratings are slipping, too. I could also be recalling some long-forgotten middle school lesson on puberty.
But do you realize how big this is? Me neither. Count van Dokkum, if you would?
“Galaxies can’t get bigger by themselves,” he explained, “They must undergo a string of collisions with other galaxies to puff up their size, growing as big as large, elliptical galaxies seen in the cosmos today.”
I’m pretty sure this means the Milky Way is on ’roids. However, I’ll wait for the results of a congressional investigation, which I’m guessing will include some stars “misremembering” getting injections near their black holes, much like Roger Clemens did.
Yet, let me attempt to breakdown the sheer enormity of this discovery for the non-scientific community. This is for scientists like finding out Capt. Picard was Capt. Kirk’s dad or that Mulder and Scully had a secret love child. And, no, I have no regrets about my blatant generalization of scientists as sci-fi geeks. Write me a letter when you get done watching “Battlestar Galatica.”
The only thing better about scientists is after all that unfettered excitement, pocket protector bursting joy, telescope-induced euphoria, they admit it could all be nothing.
“Either way, this is a potentially very important development,” the count said.
Potentially? Wait, that’s it? Now you’re not really sure at all?
Oh you scientists, you simply toy with my emotions. And you keep me coming back for more.

I'll have a double scoop of phony with nuts and whipped cream

Did anyone else catch the photo Monday of Hilary Clinton ordering some ice cream from a South Bend, Ind. Dairy Queen? Talk about cool under fire! What a tough decision between a Snicker's Blizzard and a twisty cone. Forget it lady, you almost had my vote but I needed to see you behind the counter, getting me my fudgesicle!

Let's pay attention

A individual was killed this morning trying to walk across I-25. I didn't think we needed to go over this again. But, please everyone, use the designated crosswalks on I-25 and only cross when you have looked both ways and are confident that traffic has come to a halt in both directions.

The audacity of freeloading midgets

Took the fam to a swanky restaurant last night and by swanky, I mean it had doors. We walked in and were greeted by a lovely hostess who asked "Two adults?" and then pointed to our 2-year-old daughter standing between us and asked "and her too?" I could not believe it. I immediately unclasped my daughter's hand and said "Absolutely, not." Yes, she rode in the same car as us but there was never any discussion or insinuation that we would be picking up the tab for her or that she would be sitting with us. I demanded that my daughter be seated not only at a separate table but also out of our direct line of vision because she has a tendency to chew with her mouth open which grosses us out. I understand my daughter is still at the restaurant washing dishes. She, apparently as was the hostess, was working under the assumption that because she simply arrived with us that we would be paying for her meal.